One-liners

dogbot

Bright Spark
In (a lot) of years gone by, I would put my arm out of the car window and make signals according to whether I wanted to turn left, right, or wanted the car behind to overtake.

Now, I just raise my arm to indicate "Look how clean my hands are".
 

AgentCooper

At Least I Have Chicken
Moderator
Two Tunnocks Caramel bars are stood in the arrivals lounge at Glasgow airport. One turns to the other and asks ‘how long you been a wafer?’
 

Bhuna50

Author Level
A soldier was walking across the supermarket car park today and found a distraught woman sobbing.

He asked her what was the problem and she explained that she's left her keys inside the car.

“Don't worry," he replied. "I can help."

The woman looked at him in amazement as he removed his trousers, rolled them into a tight ball and rubbed them against the car door. Magically, it opened.

"That's so clever," the woman gasped. "How did you do it?"

"Easy," he replied. "These are my khakis”


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

ubuysa

The BSOD Doctor
A wise dad.....
 

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